Its about making memories worth repressing
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
