Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Randomize