Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
