i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
