What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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