i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
