i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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