Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
