Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
