If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
