I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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