Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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