She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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