Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
