If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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