sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
