what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i came on her dog
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
