no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
