were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize