called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
