as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
