I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You ruined the universe
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
