glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize