Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
