Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
