spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize