So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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