This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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