Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
