Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
