susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
