When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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