I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
