Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I had to cum in my sink.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
