@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
