I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
