last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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