I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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