I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Randomize
