its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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