one word: firstdatebathroomanal
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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