I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
We have started to decorate penises.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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