Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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