I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
