You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
