i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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