Please, let me fuck your mom
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
