You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
