my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
it's like heaven, but drunker
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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