I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
